Confident in my own skin

In one of my previous blog post I spoke about how conscious I was at showing any amount of leg. For those who haven’t read it – see below; for those who have – skip ahead! 

It’s incredibly rare that I walk around in public showing my bare legs – be that in summer, on holiday or even at the beach.

It’s partly to due with the fact that I am always cold, but mostly because it’s something I am just not comfortable with. I used to run around with shorts as a child, climbing trees – being a monkey – you know the jazz. But, when I got older I became more and more self conscious about my body, and the part that I hated the most were my legs. I have scars from a cat, bruises from my monkey adventures, dry skin and to top it off I’ve forever had this thought that my legs are just too plump.

So, when it came to taking pictures with a dress/ skirt recently – the mere thought of not wearing tights made me not want to do it. I felt a little pressured to have to wear it without tights as there seemed to be no one on social media doing it – and you know conformity.

So I decided to rebel, I wore sheer tights and took the photos anyway. I’m sure there are people who will say it would look better without tights, but the one thing I realised is how much more comfortable I felt with them on. I wasn’t thinking about my scars, my dry skin or my bruises – I was focusing on enjoying myself instead.

I have just returned from my trip to Italy where I roamed the streets of Milan and Venice wearing play-suits and dresses without tights.


And guess what? I did not care about whether my legs looked plumpy or dry. I didn’t care about the scars on my legs or my darkened knee caps. I truthfully couldn’t care what my legs looked like, I was in love with all my summer outfits and having a blast focusing on the cities and not my legs. Yes, I may not YET be comfortable with being barelegged everyday, particular when in England but doing so on holiday is actually a big step for me. Walking around in Milan – taking small steps to the bigger goal 

I have spent a good year consciously making an effort to be more accepting of myself and my flaws. I have slowly pushed my boundaries in this case from thick tights to sheer tights to no tights on holiday. I have surrounded myself with positive people who encourage me to be comfortable in my own skin. Reflecting on this trip I have realised how far I have come and how confident I have grown in being in my skin. It is amazing how a little bit of effort into looking after yourself, focusing on your well being and working on you can actually have such a positive impact. I am actually excited to see where I am a year from now.

Love and light

xo

Dress for yourself

This Wednesday I had a civil wedding to go to and I had what was a most confusing predicament: I wanted to wear a lengha, but no-one else (that I knew of at the time) was, they were wearing a saree.

When I first considered outfits, the beautiful red lengha sitting in my cupboard seemed like the obvious choice. But when I heard everyone else was wearing a saree, I started to consider other options. I got worried that I would stand out and look odd. I was scared that the aunties would make comments that I was trying to ‘show off’ or that people would think that I was trying too hard.

The night before the wedding I tried on 3 different sarees, none of which I was feeling and let’s not even get into how bad my pleating game was. I’m assuming that this was because my heart wasn’t into wearing a saree. I wanted to wear the lengha, but pressure to look similar to other people was driving me to pick a saree. So I did what any girl would: tried the sarees on, took a picture and sent it to some people on whatsapp to get opinions and then threw the outfits on the bed while they awaited judgement.

I have some pretty awesome people two of whom I’m going to quote – who were real game changers in my choice of outfit.

Shaan: ‘Wear what you want to wear. Don’t look at what other people are wearing.’ 

Suna: ‘Since when does Shiyaa conform to what is ‘supposed’ to be worn?’

They both struck a chord with me and I felt empowered to just halt, breathe, stop caring about what other people MIGHT say or think and just do what I KNEW I wanted to.

The day of the wedding
I threw on my lengha and looked in the mirror. I have not worn a lengha since I was like 8 years old and have always felt self conscious about wearing one (showing stomach, looking like a kid etc), so this was a big deal. But I felt confident with what I was wearing, and I felt bloody happy to be wearing what I wanted.

When I got to the wedding and met other people I wasn’t even thinking about the fact that I was wearing something different. I was so content with what I was wearing and how confident it made me feel I didn’t even wonder what other people could be saying or thinking. Truthfully though, the only only thing that I did hear about my outfit was compliments (yaay)!

So what did I learn: 
a. It’s okay to stand out, it’s not always a bad thing. It’s possible to stand out in a good way.
b. Wearing some thing you feel happy and comfortable with is much more important than trying to dress to fit in


Details are so important. I accessorised with gold and pearl 🙂
Earring: Shriba Creations
Choker: stolen from my Chitthi in Canada
Waistchain: DazzlingDarling
Outfit: ShebyShiyaa

P.S. CONGRATULATIONS THANU AND THUJEEE!!!!!